Pretend for a moment that you are desperately unemployed. It might look like this: you’ve got bills piling up, you’ve got kids to feed, it’s been greater than 6 months since your last check and your parents and siblings are not willing to lend you any more money. Now, imagine that you’re sitting in an interview for a job that seems to be an ideal fit. Things are going smashingly well and you’re getting your hopes up that the slump is nearly over. And then suddenly, the hiring manager asks you a question that takes your breath away; he asks one of those questions that you were hoping, no, that you were praying he would not ask. You get that surge in your gut. You feel your tongue dry up. Your palms become clammy. You fidget as you try to come up with the most plausible answer. You start to form words and the only thing that stumbles past your lips is a clumsy set of utterances that resembles the words of a drunk college student on Spring Break.
A week goes by and in your mailbox you discover a thin envelope. You don’t even need to open it. Thin envelopes are the epitaph of a deceased job opportunity. What could you have done differently?
I prepare dozens of people for job interviews each month and I’m going to share with you the one preparation exercise that seems to work better and more often than any other. But, it comes with a warning: this is not an easy exercise. This is not a quick-fix, either. However, if you take me up on this challenge, you probably won’t have to prepare for another job interview for the rest of your career.
The reason that people stumble on interview questions is that they don’t prepare for the unexpected. The conundrum is, how does someone prepare for something when he or she has no idea what that something might be? I’ve thought about this one for a long time. As far as interviews go, I have an answer: you can’t prepare for the actual question that’s going to punch you in the gut. There’s absolutely no way to anticipate what a complete stranger is going to ask you. It’s doubly difficult when that stranger holds all, or nearly all, of the power. After all, you’re desperately unemployed.
As such, I can assure you, you have very little power in that situation. You have to prepare and anticipate that you will be asked something that you really don’t want to be asked. There are contextually appropriate questions and inappropriate questions. I highly doubt that you will be asked about off-limit topics. But some of the appropriate ones include: Why are you unemployed? Why have you been unemployed for this long? Have you ever been fired from a job? What is some of the most difficult advice a boss has ever given you? I could probably make this list go on for several pages. But, deep inside of you lurk a few questions that you really don’t want to confront in private, let along during a job interview. And if you really want to bomb the interview, then make sure you remain in denial of those difficult items.
If, however, you want to ace the interview, please take out a single sheet of paper and do the following exercise for one week. As you do this exercise, bear in mind that you will share this information with absolutely no one at all. This exercise is entirely personal and at the end of the week, you will destroy the evidence.
On the top of the piece of paper, write the following sentence: “I really hope that no potential employer ever asks me the following questions.” After that, start writing what those questions are. After each question, write out a response and say it out loud. Repeat for 5 minutes each day. When 5 minutes is up, put the paper away but make sure that you come back to the exercise the following day. Repeat it again: write out more questions and write out more answers. Say them out loud.
I don’t want to sound like a deep-South preacher but pay close attention: you are going to have to confront the demons at some point in your life. Those demons are in the business of making your life difficult. If left unchecked, the demons will always get the best of you, every … single … time. But, if there’s one thing I know about demons, it is that their power exists only if you allow them to have it. When you unmask their little demon faces, you will always be laughably surprised at how petty they are. This exercise is how you do just that: unmask the demons that will cause you to bomb the interview.
It’s important that you write and write some more. The most difficult issues that must be faced are also the ones that are typically the most deeply suppressed. Repeatedly writing, even writing the same thing over and over causes fatigue in the creative centers of the brain and eventually the brain will just want to come clean and true concerns will come out.
There is some really good news included in this. If you spend time preparing as I’ve noted, you really don’t have to prepare for anything else. OK, if you’re ambitious, you would be doing yourself a favor by brushing up on some of the common behavior-based questions and answers. Tip: those are the ones that begin with, “Can you give me an example of a time when … ” Another tip: behavior-based questions are framed to be difficult and the example doesn’t have to be very relevant. The answer simply needs to demonstrate that you listened to the question and you are paying attention as you go through life.
There you have it. The one simple tip that can give you a massive edge over other candidates. If you practice for the difficult shot, all of the other shots will be easy. Now, before you forget, take out that piece of paper and put it in the fire.