Manny’s Moans – The Dinner Guest
I was having a nice dinner outside while enjoying the beautiful sunset. I felt a little itch on my shin. I looked down to see a little black spot that in the low evening light may be a small spider. I slapped at it and it landed on the deck, shook its head and wandered away towards the side of the house.
Now, I am fond of telling people that there are few bugs in Vegas so I was annoyed by this incident. I decided to execute the offender. I took my dinner knife and began chasing this little guy around. It would have been a very amusing vision to anyone watching: A big guy with a steak knife chasing and stabbing at an unseen entity.
Well, I was unsuccessful in my quest to punish the aggressor so I consoled myself with the remainder of the glass of wine. As I refilled, the ridiculousness of the situation fully hit me.
There I sit enjoying dinner. This little whatever-it-is wanders by looking for supper (Let’s call him Emilio). Emilio sees me and thinks, “Thanks be to the Bug Gods! I am about to eat for months! I think I will start right here.” He then takes a giant bite out of my shin.
Imagine Emilios’s surprise when the would-be dinner slaps him in the left compound eye and chases him for hundreds of bug miles with a giant steel fang. Emilio had a hell of a story to tell his bug buddies. As for me, I just scratched and finished my wine.
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